Musically Disinclined

[vixalicious]

It's taken me nearly two years to be able to say the sentence "I am a writer" and not feel like a fraud. I would always tell myself that I wasn't good enough, that I wasn't published, that my writing didn't "count."

I don't feel that way any more... or at least not most days. But the one thing that always amazes me, and continually eludes me, is songwriting. I'll hear a song that touches my heart, or makes me want to punch a wall, and just. So much emotion, so much feeling, in so few words. And I can't do it.

But of course, I've tried. And now I'm going to inflict it on you :) 'Cuz I'm like that.


I’m a five-dollar freak
In a million dollar world
Never wearing the right clothes
Never saying the right words
Never seeing the right people
And it’s starting to get old

What’s the point of this game?
And where did I go wrong?
All these faces playing people
And I don’t seem to belong

Things are starting to look bleak
And I feel a little cold
Still standing on the sidelines
Still playing second string
Still hoping to fit in one day
But I’m not so very bold

What’s the point of this game?
And where did I go wrong?
All these faces playing people
And I don’t seem to belong

I’m a five-dollar freak
In a million dollar world
And it’s getting so damn old.

© Beth Lacey 2005