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*sigh*

Up at 5:30 again. I tried to get back to sleep for an hour, and then gave up. So now I'm up, having breakfast, reading through my home-buying guide. I'm looking on some websites that the book recommends, and I think it may be making me nauseous... that's a lot of money. And they have all these calculators out there that tell you whether you're better off renting vs buying, and I don't understand enough about the variables to know if I'm filling them out right.

*sigh*

Everybody I've talked to keeps telling me that it's ridiculously easy to buy a house. And I'm sure it is. But I'm freaked out that I'm going to get into some sort of really bad mortgage arrangement, or end up paying twice as much as I pay now for more headache or something.

In other homefront news, they're re-doing the water pipes in our building. Now, this is absolutely something that needs to be done. We've had leaks all summer, as you might remember from my constant whinging, and I think it's great that they're finally doing something about them. That said, it's going to be a nightmare. We have to take everything out of the kitchen cabinets and our bathrooms, and the work is scheduled to take 7-10 days per unit which will of course translate to at least two weeks of chaos and destruction.

There's a meeting tomorrow night, Scott's going to go to it, and find out more information. We want to try to get them to schedule our unit for the week of Thanksgiving and the week after, because we both work from home at times (me almost constantly this fall, yay!) and that would be the least distracting.

But the reality of it is that there's no way they'll put everything back the way it was. We've done custom painting and wall treatments in the kitchen and both bathrooms, and the apartment complex has flat out said that they will not fix that. And we're only here til February, so there's no real point to re-doing everything for that short of time, especially considering that with the holidays coming up and travelling for work, we'll both be gone half that time anyway. Scott & I talked about it Monday, and we both decided that we'd just clean really well this week, and take some pictures of the apartment the way it is now, and remember it that way. Just, stressful, you know? I don't like the idea of my home being torn up. Well, not when it's not going to be prettier at the end.

I just feel like everything's in this big state of flux right now, and even though I know life will be just as good, with the possibility to be even better, at the end of it all, it's stressing me out. And affecting my sleep patterns and my mood.

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*hugs like mad*

On the house-buying front, I'd do a couple of things. First, I'd talk with my folks or other parental figure about it. You'd mentioned you'd talked to your dad once? is he someone you can talk over things like renting vs. buying and these calculators, and mortgages and financing etc with? Don't think for a moment that you're ever "too old" to ask your parents for advice if they're people who can give it. If you don't trust your dad's head for money, what about someone at work? Do your benefits include any kind of service like that, financial counselors or legal advice or the like?

What about people you work with? Any of them who might be able to help you at least understand the variables on the calculators? (What kinds of variables are you talking about? I can try to help if you want.)

And find a reputable Buyer's Agent or Buyer's Agency. Not a dual agent, and not just a real estate agent, but a real estate agent who only helps home buyers buy homes. This person will work for you to help you through the whole home buying process. They'll help you with lawyers, inspectors, loan officers, all that stuff. Buying a home is only ridiculously easy if you have one of these people on your side, or if you've already done it a few times. And engaging a Buyer's Agent doesn't obligate you to buy a home, and to the best of my knowledge doesn't obligate you to pay them a thing if you don't. Check the terms of whomever you talk to, but at the buyer's agency I was an office chick for, they didn't get a cent if the buyer didn't buy.

If you don't have someone you can talk with about financing issues, then when you find your buyer's agent, talk with her about it and see what advice she can give you, or let her refer you to someone good. Maybe several someones, to get a few opinions.

*hugs more and more*

My dad is more than willing to help, I just need to ask him. And they offered to "help me out a bit" and I need to talk to them about what that really means.

Scott suggested I stop trying to do this all myself and go to a professional mortgage broker, so I may do that...

Also, how do you know if someone is a buyer's agent?

Also, how do you know if someone is a buyer's agent?

Oh, they advertise it that way, and in fact, I think your agent is required to tell you what kind of agent he or she is. There's a good overview of agent types at the National Association of Exclusive Buyer's Agents website:

http://www.naeba.org/buying/howtochoose.htm

They also have an 800 number and a contact form if you want to find an exclusive buyer's agent in your area:

http://www.naeba.org/agent/index.htm

If you don't have a recommendation for a mortgage broker from a friend or colleague, you might consider talking with a local buyer's agent first and see if she can recommend one to you.

You totally don't need to do it all alone. :) *hugs more*

When I bought my condo it wasn't that bad, I don't know if buying a house is worse. I had a very nice realtor. I know sometimes they can be a nightmare, though.

I think I'm just worrying about what I don't know... I had a bad car buying experience, because I know nothing about cars, and expected to get what I agreed to pay for and was shocked when they tried to cheat me. Naive, I know. So I think I'm just expecting this to be much the same and panicking ahead of time.

Well you have to have a home inspected before you finalize the sale, so you have someone telling you what you're getting, before you actually have to get it. And you should have a lawyer for your closing and he/she are there to help you, too. If you know anyone that is in the contracting, plumbing, electrical, etc. type of business, it helps to bring them along when you look at houses, too.

*cuddles you* Yep, that's stressful. And it sucks. But you will get through it, and you'll do great! *hugs more*

Thanks! *curls up in ball in lap* I usually find shopping to be more fun than this :(

Change can be really hard. You know all the stuff I went through in 2004 and to a lesser extent in '05. But what I learned from all that is that the harder you try to "deal" with it and the more you think about it, the worse it feels. The best thing to do is just try to have a zen-like attitude about it. Easier said than done, of course. And if that doesn't work, go to your doctor and get some really good pills! :-) But seriously, these things can be stressful for anyone, so just know what you're feeling is perfectly normal. As far as buying a house goes, I'd definitely recommend getting a buyer's agent. They will make it so much easier for you and will protect your interests.

Yeah, I think I'm overthinking this... I'm going to try to read my books, and then make an appointment to see someone, an agent or a mortgage broker or both... stop worrying about it and do something, as it were.

Before the doctors have to put me on the good pills permanently :D

Buying a home wasn't too difficult for me, but again, I had a good real estate agent who was a friend of the family. I'd say the most important thing to do is have the home you're looking at inspected--my sister just put a bid on a house, then during the inspection it turned out the entire roof needed replacing and the owners weren't going to do it. She pulled out. On mine I asked that a vent be fixed on my AC unit and was told it was done, only to find out later it wasn't--so if they do fix things, inspect it again.

The great thing about owning your place is that you can do anything you want to it and really make it your own (which it sounds like you want if you're actually changing things in your apartment!) The bad thing of course is that anything that breaks, you're the one who has to deal with it. And there's DEFINITELY more costs involved in owning vs. renting. All stuff to consider.

Good luck! *hugs*

My worry is that I don't know enough to know whether the inspector is doing a good job... I guess you just have to find a realtor you trust, and then trust that they will recommend the right people for you.

And I'm guessing I'll be calling my dad A LOT in the next few months.

And yeah, I've already got this vision of me in a cute little bungalow... I was actually fantasizing about hanging my clothes out to dry on a clothesline instead of on hangers in my bathroom the other day. The realism to this little daydream is that there's no actual furniture in my house :)

err yeah, furniture can be a fun thing to pay for. For my office I wanted the ability to turn it into a guest bedroom when I had guests so I found a used hotel couch/foldout bed--really cheap and cute too! Consignment can be a good place to find stuff.

And yay backyards! That to me is one of the best things of having a house.

Think of what a wonderful feeling it will be to own your own home, being able to decorate and set things up just the way you want them. I don't know that it would be so easy, so definitely having an agent to help you with all the detail stuff is necessary, because you can't think of everything. I agree that once you are looking at a home, have an inspector come to check it for you. The first house we were trying to buy ended up having over 12,000 worth of pretty immediate repairs necessary, and when we asked the buyer to either fix it or bring down the price, and they wouldn't - so we didn't buy it. We could tell some things needed a little fixing, but would never have thought it would cost so much.

Which brings me to the next part - the less obvious repairs necessary, the better, because things still pop up, and that is where the extra expense comes in - if you fix the small things as they happen, it won't be so stressful or costly as letting them pile up or get worse.

Try some lavender essential oil on your temples and wrists when you go to bed, it soothes and helps relax you to sleep.

Hugs, Love & Light

That's one of the things I've got to keep myself from doing - falling in love with a house and not walking away when I should. I'm bad about that. I may have to enlist friends to help me with that.

And I'll have to look for lavender oil, thanks! *hugs*

More unasked for advice. :) I think I may've said this before, but decide what your upper limit that you can pay is, and then don't go that high. Seriously. I saw some houses that I would've loved and that were in my range, but I would've had to live on a much tighter budget, wouldn't have had extra cash for splurges on dinners out if I wanted, etc.

Also, remember that mortgage interest is tax deductible, and that includes any interest paid on home equity loans, which you can use to pay off higher interest loans like cars or credit cards. Just be sure of your terms. I've always gone for fixed-rate loans because I don't trust the fluctuations in the interest rates, and now, hearing about people who's mortgage payments have doubled because of that and they can't make the payments anymore, I'm glad I've got a fixed rate even if it is higher than it wouldn've been if I'd refinanced to a lower variable rate.

You should've called me.... I was up. And my little dog, too!

I've got some thoughts on all of this, but it's a bit much to post at the moment. But I do think it will encourage you.

Gah! That kind of thing is so scary and disruptive and just. I know exactly how you feel. *hugses*

Everybody I've talked to keeps telling me that it's ridiculously easy to buy a house

not true! And in fact, it's not a decision to take lightly --because then you find yourself with an expensive house (all of them are) you can't sell!

Sometimes I thought it might have been easier to rent instead of buying Would have fly out of the place four months ago *sighs*

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